serious question [263]

as an ex-boozer…what would you do if you heard you had only 2 years to live?

(this is not about me but about somebody I know. the lady has a serious alcohol problem.
liver failure.

I seriously questioned myself last couple of days.
would I pick up the drink knowing that I was going to die soon or would I choose to live my life to the fullest for as long as possible?

I think I would choose the latter. what would you do?

hugs. wishing you well.


2 thoughts on “serious question [263]

  1. Wow…I’m so sorry about your friend. I remember, early in rehab, a counselor telling us a story about a man who’d gone too far into alcoholism to recover. His liver was shot, and the only thing that help would be a liver transplant that he couldn’t get because he never stayed sober long enough. How terrifying.

    In super-early sobriety (maybe three weeks), I asked the same question you pose. My answer then was, “I’d pick up a bottle and drink to the end.” I remember writing that passage; I felt like I was at the bottom of a well from which I’d never escape. That well would be my tomb.

    Fast forward to now. It’s 5:30 AM, and I’m hang-over free and sipping a cup of coffee. My wife and kids, who stuck beside me, are still sleeping. My faithful dog Charley is watching me from his favorite spot on the sofa; one of my cats is meandering through the living room. I’m listening to a new playlist on Spotify; in an hour, I’ll wake my kids up, make them breakfast, and drop my oldest off at school. Then I’ll be off to work to meet with students and help them become better writers.

    If I had two years to live, I’d want to be as clear-eyed and sober as possible. Being present in the moment, no matter what that moment is, has been a great gift of sobriety. I’m not sure how my physical life on Earth will end (and I’m not sure what happens to my energy when my body dies), but I’m not worried. I’m grateful that my energy gained self-awareness this time around; who knows what will happen the next time? For now, I’m sober. I’m not just a former drinker–sobriety informs my entire life. I wouldn’t want it any other way.

    Liked by 1 person

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